Why I missed my bus today

Every workday morning I play this crazy fun little game ,“What made me miss my bus today?” It’s loads of fun, with answers ranging from “I thought it more important to make sure my only child got to school in a safe, happy, and well-nourished manner, even though he’s in high school and can fend for himself” to “I can’t decide if v-neck t-shirts are as douchey for a female as a male.” There are a lot of specifics associated with this game, and all the variables keep my math skills sharp. You see, I keep a running total in my head of how long things are taking me during those crucial last 10 minutes before I leave the house. For instance, making myself a lunch that involves pasta and vegetables will take about 2 minutes and 13 seconds longer than making a turkey sandwich (because of the veggie chopping), yet 17 seconds less time than making an egg salad sandwich. (Note that turkey sandwich is the most time efficient, and so I never select that option.) Changing shoes can be a major time suck, adding as much as three minutes. No single task takes THAT much time, but add the indecisiveness and disorganization together and you’ve got a good wasted eight minutes.
 Knowing that I might miss a bus doesn’t mean that I’ll skip the tasks. Instead, I keep it all in my head. Then, as I approach the stop and watch as the bus pulls away, I think back to which exact task kept me from being punctual.
Today, it was this.

THREE SPACES! That’s right, this jackass is taking up three spaces in a crowded urban transit center parking lot. Stopping to take the photo cost me about 12 seconds; driving through the parking lot and realizing there were no spaces and that I needed to go somewhere else took six more minutes.

3 thoughts on “Why I missed my bus today

  1. I also agree that v-necked shirts on women are ok — even, possibly, more flattering than the other kind. Also, even when children are teenagers, it is still important to feed them. Surprisingly, they seem no more capable of doing this themselves than they did when they were small. Inexplicable. But worth missing the bus — and anyway, then you're early for the next one, right? Which maybe gives you 12 more minutes to read? Which isn't a bad thing —

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